Cherish The Journey

Dear Amias,

There has been and will be a lot of times in your life where you will take a trip, whether it's for fun, work or other reasons.  Some of those times you'll be excited to go, hate the thought of going or just indifferent to it all.  You'll probably never realize the impact or importance of the actual journey until after the fact.  Why?

Most people are in a rush in life.  They want to get there and get there now.  They see the process of "going" as a hassle and a means to the end.  But in most cases, it's the trip itself that is the best part.

Think about this...when you go to the movies, you want to be first to get the best seat, when you are at the airport you fight to get checked in and sit first or when you're at a restaurant you push your way through to get the first seat or table.  But if you're in a classroom, you will probably show up last and sit in the back.  Why no rush to get to class?  How I see it, is that a classroom has more personal benefit than getting the last bar stool.  But then again, we forget the little luxuries of the things above.

Instead of getting frustrated at the airport and rushing through, take a second to look around at all the happy people that are waiting at the gate for their special someone to get off the plane, the look of a proud parent as their son comes from from a military tour, the tear from a loved one as they say goodbye to someone.  There's something special there.  Or when you're waiting for a table, look around to see the great conversations people are having, you'll see first dates and 1,000th date.  Friends catching up from last week or from the last year.  They all have a story about how they got there.  Cherish that.

It won't be long before you'll realize how important this journey is.  You'll be all grown up and looking back at your personal journey and how you miss that scenic train ride where you daydreamed the whole time, that long drive along the coast with the top down singing Michael Jackson at the top of your lungs, the delayed flight when you had to sleep on the floor at the airport but met the nicest person and just talked all night.

The key is to realize each moment for what it is.  It's that moment in time, it's what's happening right now.  You were too young to remember, but you were fascinated with trains and one day your father took you on a train ride in Boston, it was the local subway, something thousands of people take everyday and equally complain about every day, but to you, this was like a trip to the moon.  You were excited about that journey.  The train moved, you smiled.  It went fast and you smiled.  People got on..smile.  People got off...smile.  The conductor announced the next stop..smile.  As an adult you'll take that for granted, you'll get frustrated that the train is too slow or delayed, too crowded or too dirty, you'll curse it and in some cases avoid it.  You won't remember that day in the summer of 2012.  That smile won't come back.

So...remember that it should never be about where you are, but how you get there.  Once you're there, you've done all the work already, that shows your character and who you are.  Be judged not how you react but how you appreciate.  Every day you are the youngest and oldest you'll ever be, so why not appreciate that time.  Love each step, make each one count and never rush to get there, you'll never know what you'll miss along the way.

Love, Padrino  

Choose Your Words Wisely

Amias

This past weekend you were back in Boston to be apart of your little sister's Baptism.  It was a beautiful sunny day, very similar to the day when you had yours.  But more importantly it was a day that I got to spend with you.  You've grown up so much lately.  You are running around like a big boy now.  And you're talking so much!

I'm sure your parents think you may be talking too much, but to me it was a pleasure to hear you speak, ask for things and be an unfiltered kid.

But with the power of words, the few you know and the millions you will know, you have to understand that words can be very powerful at times and not something you can ever take for granted.

One day you'll have the luxury of a girlfriend, someone you really really like, this isn't a crush, this is the L word.  You'll want to say it but nervous that she may not say it back.  You'll be a bit embarrassed that your manhood will be threatened and dance around it hoping she says it first.  But ultimately you'll say it.  Then you'll realize how beautiful it is to say to someone you truly care for.  Remember that moment.  Those words although simple and short, can have a lasting impression.

Then there'll be the days when you say things to someone that are not so nice.  On those days, that's when you need to take a step back, think, think, think and then think some more.  Why?  Because once it's said there are no "backsies".  You can't take it back.  You can apologize all you want but the words were said.  You'll let your emotions take over and your pride and ego will control you.  You'll feel like you are enforcing something and striving to make a point, but the reality is that some of the words you use are done to spite and purposely hurt.  The problem is that at that time you won't know that.  That's the funny things about words and anger.  You never know that it's the wrong thing to say until you say it.  It's life's funny lesson.

As a kid when you say something off or wrong it's kind've funny and cute, but as an adult, it's just mean and hurtful.  No one will laugh at your mistakes when you're older.  You won't get a hug for being naive.  You'll hurt someone, you may even lose someone special, a friend or girlfriend.  Then you'll apologize saying you were out of control and you can change.  You wouldn't be the first to say those words, I may have said those words just last week.  But you'll think you are the first to say those words.

So, have fun learning new words, enjoy the art of being cute when you mispronounce something.  Scream random things.  Question everything.  But remember that soon, you'll be responsible for the words you say.  The ones you tell your parents when you do something bad, the ones you use to ask for a favor, the ones you use to ask for a date and even the ones you use when you're angry.

Words are like a super power, use them for good not evil.

Padrino